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Posts Tagged ‘creationism’

Our Wrongness Proves Us Right

January 27, 2014 5 comments

by Noah Lugeons

There was an ancient tablet and it referred to a boat, so I suppose it was inevitable that the douche-shooting Christians would claim it as proof of Noah’s Ark.  You probably saw the story by now, but in case you haven’t it goes like this: Ancient Mesopotamian tablet is found and upon translating the cuneiform researchers discovered a portion of a story very similar to the story of Noah’s Ark, with the notable exception that this tablet specifies the boat as being round.

Despite the explicit addendum that this tablet provides absolutely no evidence that such an ark existed, the bulk of the headlines about the piece read the exact opposite.  Stories like “Was Noah’s Ark Round?” are cropping up all over the place and the more credulous ass-tards like Bryan Fischer are actually referring to it as “scientific proof”, betraying a lack of understanding of both of the words in those quotes.

And while the newly uncovered tablet says nothing at all about the shape of “Noah’s Ark”, it does prove just how circular the reasoning of Christian fundamentalist are.  They’re able to take what amounts to proof that their story is false and hold it up as evidence.  A story about their legend that clearly predates their version and demonstrates that they got key details wrong should be an embarrassment.  It should be enough to close the topic for good.  In fact, we probably should have shut down debate on that topic the first time we found indisputable evidence that the Jews plagiarized this story from the Sumerians.

It reminds me of the eleventh time I saw a headline about some idiot finding a dusty piece of petrified wood on a mountain and claiming he discovered the legendary ark.  You would think after two people discovered it, additional discoveries of the ark (taking place on different mountains) would turn into evidence against the historicity of the story, but the motivated reasoning of fundamentalists is easy to underestimate.

Every time I see one of these ridiculous claims make the news cycle I almost feel sorry for the more rational blend of Christianity.  They have to realize how stupid this looks to the non-Christian world.  It’s as though every time an old house was discovered in the woods it was presented as evidence for the historical Hansel and Gretel.  And yet somehow vast swaths of Christianity obliging line up to provide rationalists with ammunition every time the words boat and ancient appear in the same article.

As atheists, we should remember to thank them more often.

AIG Responds to the Dinosaur Quiz

April 30, 2013 3 comments

by Noah Lugeons

I’d start by asking if you’d seen the dinosaur quiz yet… But you’ve seen the dinosaur quiz, right?  It’s been everywhere the last few days.  I didn’t find it all that surprising, as I’m quite familiar with what “Answers in Genesis” is teaching children, but judging by the buzz this quiz got, I’m in the minority there.

For the 3 people and the spam-bot who haven’t seen it yet, it’s this ridiculous shit:

At first people couldn’t decide if it was a parody or not, but eventually the name of the school popped up, the facts were verified and yes, this is precisely the kind of shit that AIG promotes in religious schools.

And now, of course, AIG is crying foul.  They’re weeping themselves to sleep about how mean the atheists have been about it.  After all, what’s wrong with pushing demonstrably false bullshit on children under the guise of science, thus ensuring that they have no chance in hell of succeeding in any intellectual field after graduation?  What’s wrong with arming children with ignorance and finishing a test by making sure they know exactly how to pass their ignorance on and reinforce it?  What’s wrong with lying?  It’s not like there’s a commandment against it or anything.

So on his website, Ken Ham is pissing and moaning about it.  He’s upset because atheists are getting so aggressive.  He even has a list of “Evidence” that supports the claim that atheists are increasingly “intolerant”:

How Are Atheists Becoming More Aggressive in America?

  • Billboards promoting atheism and attacking Christianity have popped up across the country.

  • The American Humanist Association has launched a special website for children to indoctrinate them in atheism.

  • An atheist rally in Washington DC last year had a special promotion to encourage kids to attend their atheist camps.

  • Atheists have been increasingly using terms like “child abuse” to describe the efforts of Christians who seek to teach their children about creation, heaven, and hell.

  • Many atheists claim that children belong to the community, not to their parents.

  • Atheists have actively opposed any effort in public schools to even question a belief of evolution or suggest there are any problems with it.

Heath is on his way over to record and I’ve gotta get prepped, so I’ll trust the comments section to provide the editorial on these, but I just wanted to hop on really quick and let everyone know that they’ve noticed.  Keep up the good work.

Sunday School

May 29, 2011 2 comments

by Noah Lugeons

Starting a tradition today. I’ll do you the service of scouring YouTube each week and bring you the best that unapologetic atheism has to offer. This is a video that’s been around for quite some time but it still gives me a thrill. I was recently reminded of it and thought it would be a perfect first installment in our Sunday School video library.