Home > Uncategorized > God is an Asshole

God is an Asshole

by Noah Lugeons

I sometimes argue with Christians. If my goal was to actually change their minds, I’d consider all of my past debates to be failures. If my goal was to incite virulence and face-reddening anger, I’d consider all of them to be successes. But in truth my goal lies somewhere in between. I don’t argue to change minds or to invoke rage, but rather in the futile hope of someday understanding the opposing viewpoint.

Christians are not generally swayed by logic or reason. They tend to notice logical contradictions without realizing that they fatally handicap an assertion. They seem to think that evidence and the scientific method have validity only insofar as they prop up their own arguments. They love to run to the safe “base” of nonsense terms that place god’s ways far outside our feeble understanding and thus negating any reasonable assessment of His viability as an entity.

I think it’s rather fair to simply say that when logic is applied to god, there can only be two possible outcomes and I don’t see a lot of religious folks embracing either of them. The first, of course, is that god simply doesn’t exist and that he is the remnant of pre-scientific attempts to understand the world. The other and far less likely is that he does exist and he’s a complete asshole.

What else could you say about a deity that empowers us with such noble potentials as love, self-sacrifice and reason but then holds gullibility as the metric for our goodness? What else can you say of a deity that demands our love and then actively orders his world in such a way as to strongly suggest that he doesn’t exist at all? What else would you say about an omniscient, omnipotent being that still chooses childish responses like jealousy, bigotry and vengeance? How else could you describe a beast that would demand the sacrifice of his own son to tamp down his own obsessive and bitter need for revenge? What else can you say about a deity that would give us freewill on the condition that we choose not to use it? What more apt way could you describe a deity that would fill our brains with such powerful sexual urges and then demand that we resist them?

And how else could you describe a deity that would allow such horrid institutions as organized churches to act as his corporeal PR team without smiting the ever loving shit out of them? How else could you classify a god that demands that his loyal flock spend much of their time being invasive assholes about virtually everything anyone enjoys?

So either (a) there is no god or (b) there is a god and he’s a childish asshole who wouldn’t be worth mild praise, let alone worship. Either way, religion is equally full of shit. 

Categories: Uncategorized
  1. autum
    April 30, 2012 at 7:20 PM

    Your points are very valid, but like most atheists you’re defining god as the abrahamic god, a fatal error for your credibility. All you’ve put to shame is christianity which isn’t very hard to do, and says nothing about the idea of god in general.

  2. May 1, 2012 at 9:24 PM

    I should note that in the opening paragraph of the entry I do reference arguing with Christians, so if my points are a bitter Jesus-centric, I suppose that’s why… not sure how that hurts my credibility. Of course, God failing to smite the Christians for getting it so wrong applies to any god, but by and large, the point I was making was to the existence of the Abrahamic god.

    That being said, if you’d like to offer an alternative definition for god, I’d be happy to put that to shame as well. The problem is that whatever definition one shreds, there are plenty of faithful people out there that will simply deny the definition or postulate it so vaguely that it is meaningless. Make no mistake about it, there is no definition for god that is not laughably easy to discredit. I can’t get to all of them in one post, but if you dig around, you’ll find that I don’t always stick to the big 3 on this blog.

  3. SeriouslySpeaking
    April 30, 2015 at 8:03 PM

    God is a real Scumbag too.

  4. androo
    May 30, 2015 at 7:41 PM

    i believe there are spirits i also believe some are assholes

  5. TheBestRealAnswer
    June 27, 2015 at 9:28 AM

    Well he Never gave me a wife and family that i really wanted since he gave it to so many others, but then again with so many very high maintenance women out there these days that are very independent, selfish, and very spoiled, certainly had a lot to do with it too.

  6. TheBestRealHonestAnswer
    October 2, 2015 at 10:52 AM

    Then again since many of us good men Don’t have a wife and family today, i would certainly say that God is a real Asshole for that since he has Blessed so many others with that Gift. And with much more women these days that are very high maintenance, independent, selfish, spoiled, and very greedy, well that certainly has a lot to do with it too since many of the women now think their all that which their Not.

  7. October 13, 2015 at 2:41 AM

    I believe god is an asshole, if there really is a god. Jesus seemed like a pretty decent guy, but god, is the ultimate narcissist!
    And whats wrong with people that they need to be told not to murder, rape or steal? If u need religion to make u not do those things, then more power to ya!

    It seems like god us the real evil one and satan is the good guy whos only involved in gods smear campaign. All i remember reading about satan is he tempts people. God was thw one doing all the murdering and allowing infanticide and raping of women. What he did to poor Job was effed up! It was the first story i ever read from the bible and effed me up horrible! Then to make his own son pay for our sins! What a douche! Jesus never asked for it and even cried out against god right before his death! And christians everywhere bring up jesus dying for our sins like it was a good thing. All that dyin and suffering and murder and the world is still full of all that evil. Seems to me it was all for nothing.

    Then the fact all christians i know are assholes too! They woukd rather argue w u and call u names rather than talk lovingly and try to save your soul like a good christian should. Instead they will speak badly of u and remove u from their circle.

    Ive yet to be proven wrong.

    Btw, im not an atheist but a former agnostic. I do practice kabbalah but only bc its simply ” be kind to one another” and really big on karma.

    Im not out to impress anyone w faking pretending to be a christian like most everyone i know. If they really believed in a god then dont they realize god knows what ya’all been up to???

  8. SadButTrue.
    October 16, 2015 at 11:13 AM

    All i ever wanted from God was for him to bless me with a good wife and family that i still Don’t have today, and he has certainly blessed so many others with that gift of life which makes him a real Idiot for not giving me that gift. What a super Douchebag he is.

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